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Lada jokes
Newsgroups: fido7.humor.filtered
From: Dmitry Zavalishin <Dmitry.Zavalishin@f32.n5020.z2.fidonet.org>
Date: Thu, 12 May 94 16:08:20 +0400
Subject: [NEWS] Lada jokes

 Hello All.

 I think, this message from area REL.HUMOR seems to be interesting:

--------------------------- Start Cut -------------------------
From : ysavelie@metz.une.edu.au, 2:50/128 (12 May 94 03:16)
To   : All
Subj : Lada jokes
X-RealName: Yuri Savelieff

A man walks into a used car dealer, and looks around at the spare parts
counter. The salesman behind the desk says to him: "Can I help you Sir?"
The man looks at the sales rep and says "I'd like a windscreen wiper for
my Lada please."
The salesman replies "I think that's a fair swap..."

Q. What's the difference between a Lada and a golf ball?
A. At least you can drive a golf ball 200 yards...

Q. What is the difference between a LADA and a tampon?
A. A tampon comes with a tow rope.

Q. What is the difference between the Jehovah's Witnesses and a Lada?
   (small car made in Russia.)
A. You can shut the door on the Jehovah's Witnesses.

Q. Why do Lada's have rear window heaters?
A. To keep your hands warm when you are pushing it.

Q.  how do you double the value of a lada?
A.  fill it with petrol

Q. What's the difference between a LADA and a sheep?
A. It's more embarrassing if you're caught getting out the back of a LADA.

So this little girl is walking home from school when a man pulls over to
the side of the road, and calls to her
"If you get in I'll give you a loolipop."  The little girl ignores him and
keeps walking.  The car follows along behind her, and again the man
driving calls to her:
"If you get in, I'll give you TWO lollipops."  The girl ignores him, and
she keeps walking as the car follows her along the street.   Finally the
driver says
"Hey, if you just get in for a tic, I'll give you THREE lollipops."  To
this the little girl turns t him and says
"Hey dad, you bought the bloody lada, you can drive it"

Q: What do you find in the glove box of a lada?
A: A bus timetable


           Mr. Yuri Savelieff            Take your dying  with
 _--_|\    P.O.Box U178            some seriousness,  however.
/      \   New England University  Laughing on the way to your
\_.--._/<--UNE-Armidale NSW 2351   execution is not  generally
      v    AUSTRALIA               understood by less advanced
                                   life  forms,  and   they'll
e-mail: ysavelie@metz.une.edu.au   call you crazy.
Phone:  (61 67) 72 2383 (home)          -- Messiah's Handbook:
        (61 67) 73 2426 (work)             "Reminders for  the
Fax:    (61 67) 72 7414                    Advanced Soul".

 $ MolchiGin: unknown (2:50/128.0@fidonet)

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